Tuesday, May 04, 2004

10 things i hate about you 

becks1st day back to work after coachella=notso fun. all sorts of issues while i was gone, no one covered my programs despite detailed instructions, etc. but whatever, vacation is always worth it. coachella was so ephing best. i'll have a full breakdown of highlights later (so many tees bovs'ed on!!), but wanted to let you know what i thought was totally worst. i found most of these pretty funny at the time, so it's not like they impacted my overall awesome experience at coachella in any way. i will be going back next year for it. consider this a self-improvement list for the folks who make coachella happen.

top 10 things that sucked about coachella:

*1) beck
2) adam brody- i didn't see him since he was stumbling around the vip area stoned out of his mind on pot/coke. 2 VERY reliable & beautiful sources reported that during the pixies' set, he tried to eat his airwalk shoes. they then approached brody & asked him for a piece of gum, to which he turned his red blood-shot eyes towards them & could not formulate anything other than a gibberish laden incoherent sentence.
3) mischa's barfin- again, two beautiful & reliable sources reported seeing the oc star mischa barton getting worked on by her billionaire boyfriend against the fence in the vip area. classy & sexy.
4) giant piles of trash everywhere- since there were only 14 trash cans on the entire polo grounds, overflow trash got piled up in mountain form once the trash cans were full. it added a pleasant spice to the overpoweringly strong smell of horse manure in the parking lot. saturday after the show i nearly walked into a pile of trash & fell. the same piles of trash were there the next afternoon. less trash, more ash next year.
5) my (felt-tip) pen was confiscated at security- security said 'you'd be surprised how much damage it could cause. i've seen it happen'. my response after un-winable protest, 'f*ck it!' & walked away.
so best ever6) flaming lips singing happy birthday to beck- wtf? i thought they & beck had a huge falling-out in '02. their set had so much buzz when wayne coyne descended from outerspace in a giant bubble. it was squandered away when their 5th & final song of their set was happy b-day to beck. worst ever.
7) incompetent stoner sound guys- so many sets started late due to sound issues, or started w/out working microphones, equipment, etc. the killers were 15min late & the sound was bad initially (no keyboards, poor vox). brmc's mic's didn't work until the end of the 1st song. fire these stoner retards & get some decent talent. set times are tight, don't need a 1972 indio back-alley abortion clinic put on by sound guys to waste time.
8) the killers- pulled a 20-piece church choir on-stage for the last 2min of their final song. so pretentious. i hope they found them walking around the parking lot or something. what a waste. couldn't even hear the choir singing. i laughed for at least 20min when this las vegas casino-lobby abortion pulled this stunt. worst part is the chorus goes something like 'i've got soul but i'm not a soldier' (over & over). & their 'indie rock saved my life' song is simply beck.
9) political speeches from lead singers in-between songs- wayne coyne telling everyone repeatedly to 'stop bush' & vote john kerry. cursive's singer telling everyone to register to vote, vote in '04, & vote john kerry. i went there to hear good music, make fun of stupid things (like beck), not to hear you tell me how i should vote. i'm not even registered to vote.
10) misc- wilco canceling---cos saturday ended early, pushing thousands of people over to see kraftwerk's set in a much smaller tent. the cure starting 25min late.

sorry, i can't resist ripping on beck-
*beck- so boring, so quiet, such a douchebag. starts like 15-20min late, plays nothing but solo acoustic songs from sea changes. so quiet i had to climb over sleeping zombie corpses just to actually hear him playing. only played 4 or 5 songs, none of which were any of his good ones. don't bother showing up next year. so beck. happy birthday douchebag.

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